Tag Archives: sleep

Been sleeping fitfully for about a week

In high school, I had a habit of going to bed late, falling asleep later, and waking up at three, then four, then five, at each hour until I get fed up with the process and get out of bed. It seems that I have been falling back into this habit. While waking up early has been giving me extra time to complete assignments and get reading done, it’s beginning to affect my emotions and concentration.

This effect is more pronounced the nights after those days I remember to take my allergy medication (I’m notoriously bad about taking it consistently during the Winter). The dreams are more vivid, the wakings more frequent, and the restlessness more pronounced. I can’t turn off my brain, no matter how sleepy I feel.

For the next week or so, I will try to record each night’s dream and whether I remembered to take my allergy medication the day before. I may also make a note of the things I’ve been reading/thinking about during the day. Oftentimes those have an influence on my dreams, directly or indirectly.

Didn’t take my allergy meds today. Let’s see how the dreaming goes.

Mosquitoes

Looking back, I know for a fact that there was good reason for my younger self to have had insomnia. As a kid, I attracted mosquitoes like a magnet attracts iron shavings. Mom always told me that I have sweet blood.

I was the kind of kid who couldn’t stop itching a mosquito bite once I started, so I often had inflamed, infected bites on my legs. It was gross.

Well, when we moved back to Germany for my dad’s second tour there, we stayed in a temporary house for about half a year (I can’t remember exactly when we moved from Kalkar to Goch because I didn’t change schools or anything). It was there that I discovered exactly how much sleep I would get on average for the next three years.

I would go to bed. I would close my eyes. I would try to fall asleep.

Then I would hear it. It didn’t matter if I was dozing or in full dream, I would hear that zzzzzzeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee of mosquito. I would snap awake. For the first few weeks, I would snap awake and find them on my walls. I’d kill them right then and there, leaving gruesome splotches of grey and red on the paint. I never cleaned those up- they were symbols of my victories over the bloodsuckers. I could go to bed afterwards and sleep relatively soundly.

It steadily got more difficult. They started resting farther up on the ceilings, or they just disappeared.

One night, I woke up to the sound and got out of bed. I turned on the light and saw… nothing. The only mosquitoes visible were the ones I had already smashed on the walls. I went back to sleep.

The noise occurred again. I got out of bed and turned on the light again. Still… nothing. Weird. I thought at first that I might be hearing them out of anticipation of hearing them.

It happened like this a couple more times before I finally thought to check the curtains.

Now, these curtains were greyish-brown. Drab, like the room. I cautiously approached them, and, taking a great fistful of the coarse material in each hand, SHOOK them.

With a ZZZZEEEEEEEEEEEEE magnified by the vibration of hundreds of wings, a swarm of them emerged en masse from my curtains.

Needless to say, I was traumatized by the incident. Later that night, I worked up the courage to go into my room and kill all of the mosquitoes, but I was forever paranoid of those curtains and of sleep.

When we moved to Goch later that year, I slept on a mattress on the floor of my room until my parents got me a loft. With the loft, they got me a mosquito net (something neither of my siblings required).

Lofts are not made for mosquito nets. Or, rather, vice-versa. We rigged that thing with duct tape and clothespins. It worked pretty well, but mosquitoes could still get in when I climbed into bed, or through holes that I had not seen.

Some of the worst nights of my life have been spent after hearing that zzzzzzeeeeeeeee of mosquito and trying to find the damned insect. I patched holes, I flicked the light on and off (the mosquitoes eventually started hiding when the light was turned on, so the best way to find them was to catch them as they flew around), I would read until I felt calm enough to sleep again.

I’m not a night person, but I developed extreme insomnia while we were overseas due to this tiny pest.

the extra ingredient in my shampoo attracts trouble

Or, rather, surreal/bizarre encounters with strangers.

This time, it was in my dorm room freshman year.

I lived on the third floor of a girls-only building, in an out-of-the-way corner. Despite how stupid this may have been, my roommate and I never locked our door. This was a habit born of the fact that neither of us remembered to bring our key when we left the room.

And, despite how dumb this was, it became a problem only once.

I remember going to sleep one night (I was on the top bunk.) I don’t remember whether Margot (for that was my then-roommate’s name) was there. If she was, she did not wake up for this incident.

I woke up to the door opening and closing. I thought it was Margot, but then there was somebody climbing into my bed and kissing my shoulder. Yeah, he kissed my shoulder. I asked him, “Who are YOU?”

And he asked me, “Who are YOU?”

Me: “I’m Erin [My Last Name]. Who the HELL are YOU?!?”

In a moment, I had climbed out of my bed. He hadn’t answered the question. Instead, he climbed out after me and we proceeded to hold this conversation in the hallway. He was shirtless. I might have been more alarmed, but he looked like a college student and it was nearly impossible to get into this building without somebody signing you in.

So I asked him, “Where are you supposed to be? Who signed you in?”

He couldn’t answer either of those questions. He was quite silent throughout the questioning. In the spirit of getting this random person out of my hair, I walked him all over the dorm, hoping that one of the doors would spark some recognition on his part. I even took him to the front desk to see if we could find his name and that of the girl who had probably signed him in.

Nothing worked. He seemed dazed (people since have told me that he was probably high, but I wasn’t (and am still not) in the practice of pointing high people out, so you’ll excuse my ignorance) and I felt bad, but I left him in the hallway outside my door once it was clear that we weren’t going to find where he was supposed to be.

I made sure to lock the door behind me.

A few days later, I saw him walking on campus. He was hand-in-hand with a girl who lived right across the hallway from me.